Well, I like my characters banter-y and clever. You know, the type of romance that develops from fast-paced jokes and a lot of bickering. Two clever bastards involved in mutual mindgames and trying to out think each other because they’re fascinated by the other’s intelligence or knowledge or resourcefulness.

I also like when they have passions and goals that are unrelated to the romance and sometimes pretty secondary to that. That’s because I love relationships where the conflicts are internal, not external: conflicting ideologies, difficult personalities, past trauma, etc. So getting the characters together is about getting over themselves, not about getting over external obstacles. Maybe one is more morally grey and the other is more strict. Maybe they were dicks to each other in the past. Maybe they’re just that dumb

I love identity porn because I love, love, love relationships that are about discovering each other and realizing what makes the other person tick, even when you thought you knew them well. Plus romances where they have to admit their feelings after intimacy: arranged marriage, FWBs that stop being so casual, etc. The kind of situation where the important shift in the relationship happened, but they still haven’t admitted it.